Don't worry, this isn't a spoiler for a movie that hasn't come out yet, this is me trying to come up with a clever title that subtly suggests how small can be powerful. "Why's that?", I hear you ask. Because, my dear fellow voluntraveller, I am going to be monologuing about the importance of tiny connections.
I think it gets harder to create and maintain friendships when we're older. I'm only 25 and I'm finding that the number of people I interact with has dwindled massively and it's often harder to find time for those interactions as I get on with work, looking after my health, chores, learning (I've started taking German lessons to improve my fluency) and all of those little bits in my day that take up a surprisingly large amount of my time.
Within that context, the advice you always receive is to really focus on spending time with those that are important to you. Life is short and there's not much spare time available outside of your responsibilities, so don't waste it with those that you aren't close to. I agree with that message to a certain extent, but - as all things in life - it just ain't that simple.
With less pressure and more enjoyment comes increased confidence, so my fingers are crossed for maintaining a positive spiral.
My dad recently suggested this podcast to me all around the power of tiny interactions. These are those not-so-deep relationships that you form with people that may even only last a moment, like stroking a dog and talking to the owner, both of whom you may never see again in your life.
Recently, I've started actively looking for those tiny interactions. For me, they've come in the shape of going to the same café every morning to start my work day, chatting to fellow boulder-ers at the climbing gym, attending Meetups (a great app - highly recommended) with other Young Professionals in Newcastle and even going to the same till lady in Morrison's when she's working because she's lovely (but probably doesn't recognise me at all).
In all of those situations, I'm not expecting to come out with a best friend who I'll spend all my time with. That has meant a reduced pressure on my social occasions and allowed me to enjoy them more as a result. With less pressure and more enjoyment comes increased confidence, so my fingers are crossed for maintaining a positive spiral.
These tiny interactions mean that I'm interacting with people much more frequently - important for me as a remote worker - and that I don't feel so isolated in Newcastle, a city made up of largely students and families, and not all that many people in my stage of life. I think in a modern world where tech has made it harder to maintain a sense of community in the 'real' world, small connections are an antidote to not feeling belonging.
I've also started developing friendships from this method; I just so happen to have met 4 other German speakers/learners at the Young Professionals Meetups, so I created a group chat with them all and we went for a coffee yesterday. I need to reply to the WhatsApp, but I think we're looking at doing a similar thing next week, which I'm looking forward to.
I'm also looking forward to hearing whether this has inspired you to seek out those smaller connections and I'd love to learn about your own experiences. Write a comment, send me a message or give me a call, I want to hear what you have to say.
Happy voluntravelling,
The Voluntraveller
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